Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Co-sleeping

There's a whole parenting "argument" out there nowadays. On crib-sleeping vs. co-sleeping. Before Henry was born I was 100% on the crib-sleeping side of things.
After Henry was born? I slowly changed my opinion.

There are three standard qualities of babies in my opinion:
Good vs Not Good Eater
Good vs Not Good Sleeper
Good vs Not Good Temperament

If you only have one child and they fall into the Good category for all three... Just stop now. Because you have a miracle child on your hands.

If you have a child that falls into the Not Good category for all three, well my prayers are with you and you are a saint. Because I would lose my mind.

But I figure most people get two out of three Goods. Henry happens to fall into the Not Good Sleeper group. At least not Good in his crib. Everywhere else, we're golden.

I could count on one hand the number of nights in his first year where he slept more than 8 consecutive hours. In fact I remember the first time he did. We had just watched Limitless, and I pretty much felt like the main character when I woke up the next morning. I was Wonder Woman that day. That's what 8 hours will do to you have months of sleeping in 2-4 hour increments.

I tried the cry-it-out method, but honestly anything over 8 minutes just breaks my heart. So as soon as I deemed Henry old enough to be "un-squishable" I ended up throwing him in bed with us when he cried in the middle of the night. Or at 5 in the morning. Because I just can't get up that early.

I know co-sleeping can be unsafe. But at 2 AM I just didn't have the drive (or heart) to wrestle my 1.5 year old into bed. In our bed? He sleeps until 7:30 or 8. In his crib? He cried until you came and got him.
Until recently. A couple of months ago, he didn't mind being in his crib by himself after he woke up, as long as it wasn't in the middle of the night. I could here him talking to himself in the mornings for fifteen minutes or so before his squawks of "Mom" and "Up" required my attention. While its all baby babble I imagine him to be saying...

Good morning self. 

When I have a better grasp on language I'm going to have to ask what this dreaming business is all about. 

I'm going to avoid head-butting Mom today. She didn't seem to like that yesterday. Or maybe I'll try one more time just to make sure she doesn't like it.

Etc.

And then miraculously in the last few weeks, Henry doesn't mind being in his crib before he falls asleep. In the past I had just read him a couple of books until he passed out, which usually never took long. Then I quietly backed out of his room like a ninja (on rare occasion stepping on a loud toy, and re-starting the bedtime process.)

It's like all of a sudden, he likes being in his crib. I can say "Okay, love you see you after nap." And he just smiles and waves bye-bye.

But really it's been like HALLELUJAH. We must be doing something right. Maybe once a week he wakes up in the middle of the night, and I go get him and put him in bed with us, but mostly he sleeps 9-7 or later with a 2-3 hour nap during the day.

My point? There's no right or wrong way to do your parenting, as long as your heart is in the right place. On paper one thing may look like the safest, most practical option. But in practice? Things are totally different. Would it be the end of the world to have a 5 year old in my bed a few nights a month? No. And totally worth it to me to have those precious extra hours of sleep now.

What's your opinion on co-sleeping vs crib-sleeping? What worked for you?

Sidenote: Sometimes when I write posts on parenting, and parenting-topics I have to laugh. Since when am I a parent? And a good-enough one that I think I can give people advice? Especially when Henry does things like this.



Apologies for when I forget to video in landscape :)


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1 comment:

  1. Dane just watched the videos with me and said "that's my friend Henry."

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